Emotion Isn’t a Flaw, It’s a Feature
Last week, I had the privilege of speaking at our Spring Durlston Partners Women At The Table event, a night dedicated to connection, conversation, and celebrating women in finance and tech. I spoke about a topic that often goes unspoken in high-performance environments: emotion regulation.
Afterward, I had the pleasure of chatting with many of our guests who resonated with the message and asked to see the slides. Instead of just forwarding a deck we wanted to offer something a little more personal, a reflection on what I shared and why I believe this topic matters.
Why emotions? Why now?
We’re often told to “leave emotion at the door,” especially in high-performance environments like trading, entrepreneurship, and tech. But what if our emotional insight is exactly what makes us effective?
During my Masters in Performance Psychology at The University of Edinburgh, I explored how emotions shape decision-making in high-pressure environments. I conducted in-depth interviews with expert traders, people with over a decade of experience in volatile markets. What stood out was this: the highest performers didn’t eliminate emotion. They integrated it.
Emotions weren’t viewed as interference, they were information. These experts relied on their emotional awareness and resilience to pause before acting, to stay out of the market when needed, to recognise pattern shifts, and to trust their intuitive read of risk. This is what psychologists call naturalistic decision-making, using lived experience, pattern recognition, and emotional regulation to make fast, sound decisions in real-world complexity.
Let’s redefine emotion
Traditionally, emotion has been cast as the opposite of rationality, especially in male-dominated industries. But neuroscience and psychology both now tell us that’s an outdated idea.
Emotions are signals. They reflect our values, risk perception, and sense of safety. Ignoring them doesn’t make us more rational, it makes us more likely to miss key cues.
We’ve often been conditioned to downplay emotional insight to be taken seriously. But emotional intelligence is not a liability. It’s a strategic advantage. It sharpens decision-making, strengthens leadership, and increases adaptability, especially when things get uncertain.
So when we talk about Women at the Table, we’re not just talking about numbers. We’re talking about what we bring. And emotional intelligence is part of our edge.
Five strategies to regulate emotion under pressure
If you’re curious how to apply this in your own high-stakes environment, here are five practical, evidence-based strategies to try:
1. Name it to tame it Taking a moment to label what you’re feeling, “I’m stressed,” “I feel frustrated”, creates cognitive space for clarity and control. This helps develop emotional awareness.
2. Use your breath Deep, diaphragmatic breathing activates the parasympathetic nervous system and helps bring your body and mind back into balance.
3. Rehearse mentally Visualising how you want to respond in high-pressure moments primes your nervous system for action and builds confidence.
4. Lean on your network Emotion regulation doesn’t have to be a solo mission. Engaging trusted peers, mentors, or coaches helps us gain perspective and stay grounded.
5. Reflect with curiosity Instead of judging your emotions, ask, “What is this feeling trying to tell me?” This reflective stance transforms emotion into valuable insight.
Final thoughts
Emotion isn’t a flaw. It’s a feature. And learning how to work with it, not against it, is one of the most powerful ways we can sharpen our edge, lead with presence, and support others around us.
Whether you’re navigating markets, building products, managing teams, or making difficult calls under uncertainty, your emotional insight is part of your cognitive toolkit. It helps you pause when needed, notice what matters, and make decisions with greater intention.
So the next time you’re told to “leave emotion at the door,” consider this: when understood and well-regulated, emotion isn’t something to suppress, it’s something to use.
Here’s to leading with intelligence, emotional and otherwise.